My Journey to Getting & Staying Healthy
ADHD, impulsive over eating, OCD & the need to "be perfect." After reading another blogger's post regarding body image & the negative messages we feed to our children through society's expectations, I feel compelled to share my story. Last year, I took a solid analysis of my relationship with food, body image, & what I was teaching my daughter. From an early age, like most little girls, I became aware of expectations of women to stay in shape. I remember my dad making jokes about my mom going to "the fat farm" to work out. When my parents were still married, my birth mother at 5'10" weighed 130 pounds. Although she years later ate her way to obesity, she was far from it at that point.
All through high school & college, my weight stayed pretty steady at 125#. (I'm 5'6"). I can't say that my weight was that way for the healthiest of reasons & throughout my adult life, like many women, I have struggled with my weight. I, like many others, turn to food in times of stress. I remember beginning in middle school (gym class memories anyone), becoming more aware of the comparisons of girls' bodies. It became obvious fast that according to society, fat meant ugly & there were plenty of ways that teen girls learned how to stay skinny. I remember one summer eating very little on a regular basis so I could fit "the norm." I remember one year in high school "feeling sick" on a regular basis & knowing if I just got rid of whatever made me feel that way, I would "be fine." While saying that I was lucky this is as far as it went might seem extreme to some readers, I was fortunate because this didn't necessarily become a long term habit of either behavior.
In my adult years though, I did realize that having grown up on lots of processed food & knowing how happy sweets made me, I would find myself eating those sweets a bit over impulsively & my weight has fluctuated tremendously. When I took a solid assessment of this behavior last year & what the scale said, I decided to make a change. I qualified as overweight & my daughter might look like her dad, but if there is a high maintenance gene to be inherited or a bad habit, she tends to pick up my toughest ones. Did I really want her to learn from me that if something is hard to deal with, she should over indulge in some sweets? If I'm going to make these major dietary changes, how will I talk through the issues & decisions in an age appropriate manner AND ensure that I am teaching her how to have a positive body image? I spent some time researching nutrition & how it affects our bodies. My birth mother who had previously been underweight & now is obese with arthritis, fibromyalgia, high blood pressure, & pre-diabetic is far from how I wanted to end up & as I learned about nutrition & auto immune disorders (little one & I have celiac), I learned that rarely does a person with one auto immune disorder just have one for long & processed foods really feed into this downward spiral. Eliminating grain & sugar became very obvious inflammatory drivers & I was desperate with a year long mysterious head to toe rash that five MDs couldn't identify the source of it.
After having my fridge, pantry, & freezer cleaned out on the morning news,
http://www.digtriad.com/video/default.aspx?bctid=1736833830001&odyssey=mod%7Cnewswell%7Ctext%7CFRONTPAGE%7Cfeatured
I had the opportunity to explain to lil e that we were going to be feeding our bodies more foods that are made by God & Mother Nature & less food made by scientists. I explained that our bodies work better when we eat real food than when we eat fake food. I began the meal planning process again & started using many recipes from Maria Emmerich's cook books & blog, after Dr. William Davis of Wheat Belly endorsed her recipes (most are kid friendly), I was thrilled. Her blog can be found at http://mariahealth.blogspot.com/
I learned through this journey of getting healthy that when I'm stressed, I eat what sounds good & is on hand. I learned to keep her healthified snacks on hand by baking in bulk on the weekends & prepping for any out of town trips with cooking ahead & bringing with me. I learned that while my goal was to lose 27# & get to a certain weight, the words I said to my daughter were just as important as the words I said to myself. I learned to give myself some wiggle room. The grain free, sugar free from scratch is 80% of what we eat. I learned that she needs to know the why & how of what we put in our bodies & to focus on discussions about real foods. Read the ingredients to her & explain what these ingredients are. When they were questionable, ask e if she thought we should eat wax, etc. (Rad the labels on some of those "fruit" gummy snacks.)
I reached my weight goal, but more importantly, I've had tremendous opportunities & continue to leverage the opportunity to let my daughter have input in the meal planning process & understand why we eat what we do. I took her to Disney to celebrate her birthday & Halloween donations, along with mommy getting healthy again to help my body work better so we could play more. I have people on a regular basis make comments about my weight change or ask how can I possibly make time for this or put so much effort into cooking. The answer is easy: we don't change our behaviors unless or until we have a reason to do things differently. I had a big reason to get healthy & I don't regret committing to being healthier for myself & my daughter. I don't regret stopping the binge eating or impulsive behaviors that were destroying my health. I don't regret taking the time to teach my daughter what it means to eat healthy & why. So when you ask how can I spend time in the kitchen, meal planning, etc, it's simple, I'm investing in my daughter's & my future.
***7/2014 Update - Blessed to have found and partnered with a health & wellness company that allows me to now spend less money and time on so much meal prep, while still falling in line with my stringent requirements.***
My bonus mom also joined us to celebrate 5 years breast cancer free.