Moving Forward - Corporate My Way

It's been over two years since I said goodbye to corporate America. I turned my back with zero plans of returning. I closed the door to pharmaceutical sales, shredded my brag books, burned the bridges. I was D-O-N-E! How is it that tomorrow will be my first day back in the field? To say that I have mixed emotions about tomorrow would be putting it mildly.

I planned on building my home based business, being a work at home mom, and being successful with it. There have absolutely been successes! I have stretched myself in ways I never imagined: mentally, emotionally, and financially. I can definitely tell you a thing or two about living lean. I can also tell you that as challenging as it has been, while there are elements I have said so many times I wish hadn't been a part of this journey, I am learning that all of that hard stuff was there for a reason. I am still working through some of it. Everyone is working through something, no matter who they are, how much you might admire them, or how much they might appear to have all of their shit together, everyone is working through something.

Working from home has also allowed me amazing opportunities I never would have had if I was in the traditional job world the last two years. Lazy summer days at the pool, enjoying getting snowed in and not worrying about when the boss was going to insist I risk my safety and get on the road, being able to pack my family up when the hurricane hit and knocked out our power for days, spontaneous weekday dates and not worrying about what day of the week it was. Saying yes to spontaneous vacations, being there for my daughter when she has been sick, being able to be at school within minutes when she had a seizure and going through the testing, and being able to finally meet the love of my life and adjusting to his absolutely crazy schedule. None of this would have been possible if I had been in the regular job world.

I also never would have had the opportunity to go back to it on my terms when the right opportunity landed in my lap one day at just the right moment. I had other opportunities come across my screen the last two years and each and every time, I passed them on to somebody that either was looking or knew somebody that was looking. A little over a month ago, another opportunity came up on my screen. I was curious. I investigated and I found an opportunity that was finally worth making some changes.

The decision wasn't easy. My life partner and I discussed it at length, how it fits into our current schedule and our life goals. A big part of me is doing this for our future family, but there's also a part of me that's doing it for me. I know that working from home the last two years has helped me to grow. It has also had limiting aspects to it. I spoke to my daughter about how thing that she has become accustomed to won't be the same moving forward. I spoke with both of them about how my demands externally will need to be met. It will help me to establish accomplishing goals once again both for myself and for others, where as a big part of me has been working on my business, but has been more responsive at times to my family's overall needs than to my business at times. It's what was needed and I wouldn't change a single minute of having the ability to be there for them.

I can't say it's going to be easy. Explaining where I have been for the past two years to customers seems overwhelming. Talking to the reps that I have repeatedly said no way could I ever go back and then going back. What will they think?! Don't we all go through this though? Don't we all have moments when we think everyone is going to judge us. Everyone is going to have an opinion and they're going to think and say this and that?

The truth is some might. Most actually won't. It's more in our heads than it is in the real world. I am going back because an opportunity came across my desk that aligns with my beliefs and goals. There is actually a company and product that I believe enough in to come out of my comfy athleisurewear and go back to the corporate grind. Yes, this means that I am winding down my individual coaching side of my business. I love working with individuals and helping them achieve their goals while being able to avoid many pharmaceutical products. I love researching and sharing and helping each person. I also have a family to provide for and the parts of my health coaching that I was enjoying the most were the ones that weren't income producing. The research doesn't count as billable hours.

The amazing products that I have talked about for almost five years that have changed my body and how it functions are still a part of my life and will continue to be. And they will once again help me sustain my busy life that takes the next step in this journey. Tomorrow I will walk back into doctors offices and call on old and new customers. I will have engaging intellectual conversations that I have surprisingly missed over the last two years. I will also have doors shut and be told that there is no access. I will have rejection and I will have challenges. I know that I will work for and experience success in a different way than before because this time, it's different. It's on my terms. I chose to come back, to share products that I believe have benefit for the patients and not just for a company's bottom line. I am still a teacher at heart.

While I come back into the traditional workforce, I will continue to be a mother to an amazing daughter who is growing into such a wonderful young woman. I will continue to grow my relationship with my amazing life partner, with his crazy pilot schedule and our two houses in North Carolina while he starts construction later this year on the house in Germany for our time with his children. I will continue to take care of my tripod baby and give her the best I can as she turns fifteen years old later this month. I will continue to take care of myself. And I will return to making an impact on patients' lives in an indirect manner because this time, I am working the corporate world my way. I am sure of myself, who I am, why I am doing this, and how what I am doing fits into life as a whole. At the end of the day though, I am coming back to corporate because this time I am saying yes to an opportunity on my terms.