In Case of Emergency...

Remember to first put on your own oxygen mask, then help others around you. This is absolutely one of my biggest weaknesses. Having been raised by a mother incapable of parenting and being there for her child, I basically take the other extreme: trying to be the best mom I can be, which tends to sacrifice taking care of myself. This results in a frustrated short tempered me and well since I've been pretty open and honest on here, I know that I am not alone. I am not the only mom who catches herself having to step out of the room to calm down, or at times, raising my voice to later be so disappointed in myself. I have a wonderful daughter: thoughtful of others, a people pleaser, smart, and fortunate to be blessed as pretty cute too. She is also very sure of herself, persistent, and stubborn. I have a good idea of which side of the gene pool produced those traits. As a single parent, there are lots of different parenting challenges. There is no tag out for when your frustration level is through the roof. There is no second person in the house to reinforce lighting that fire under her to get out of the house. It's just me. I must get basics accomplished, provide what is necessary, keep her healthy, and keep her on track. It's tough enough for this ADHDer to be on time. Factor in a kid with her own agenda and it's no wonder I limit our outings etc. As a parent, there are many things I look back on from my youth that I want to do differently. Different opportunities I want to provide, etc. No, not hand her everything, but rather be more involved. It's tough to do this when I forget to first put on my own oxygen mask. Yes, I have accomplished some huge goals over the last year that were about me bettering myself, but like everybody else, I am definitely far from perfect. I am proud of losing twenty-eight pounds, taking my daughter to Disney World, teaching her to give back to others with the children's hospital & wounded warriors project, teaching her to eat healthy (even with the kicking and screaming on some aspects), and becoming debt free. There are sacrifices along the way and things I had to give up. I have been rather isolated in a townhouse neighborhood that is mostly empty nesters and those in their pre-child bearing years. Squeezing in time with other adults, working out, etc have all but disappeared from my calendar. This is not a healthy way to handle things, unless you happen to be an introvert, which I am not. Enough of the whoa is me, let's think through how I need to fix this because it's my responsibility. My next goal is to take care of myself. As cliche as it is, when we take care of ourselves, we are better people for those we care about the most when we don't we find ourselves running on fumes. Does this sound familiar? If it does, I ask you to make this commitment with me. I pledge to do something for myself daily to recharge my own batteries. I promise to set up mini objectives along the way and attainable not over the top rewards for myself. How am I going to hold myself accountable? I'm going to commit to more frequent blog updates. My goal is five posts per week, but will not scrutinize or beat myself up if I fall short on this goal. If you're on board and want to have a nice little hold each other accountable group, subscribe to my blog, post your commitments, and let's hold each other to it. This is to be a positive environment for us to grow individually and encourage each other. Please take a few moments for yourself and those that care for you and think through how you can be a better you, be better for others, recharge your battery, and be able to rest at night with positive thoughts versus the self defeating thoughts that keep you up at night. What's in your self commitment wallet?

(Originally posted 12/29/13, taking care of self is key to accomplishing any goals and as moms, we tend to put ourselves last.)